I think I’ve mastered the art,
Of taming my wild heart,
Now my heart doesn’t flutter,
Thinking about you,
And my mind doesn’t revolve in circles,
Making up stories about me & you,
Ah! It feels so good to be free,
From this day-dreaming spree,
Where you’re on my head,
Every second of my day.
Phew!
I thinking I’ve finally, successfully
Un-crushed on…
Uh-oh!!
This is fatality!
I’m writing poetry
About
YOU!
Get the f*** out of my head!!!
Forgive, forget, and move on,
I don’t know, how you do it.
‘Cause 4 years and 5 months later,
I still can’t look myself in the mirror.
After what I did to you,
I don’t know me anymore.
Who am I? I have no clue,
And my heart is still sore.
But you forgave me in an instant,
Didn’t even ask for an explanation.
And years later, I still ponder…
“Did you care?” I wonder.
‘Cause if our places were reversed,
We would no longer stay friends,
That would have been the end.
For this poem, I took a line, ‘If our positions had been reversed, would I have forgiven her?’ from The Queen of Hearts by Kimmery Martin.
Featured image by: Victoria Borodinova from Pexels
It’s the same roads we’ve driven,
More times than I can count,
The icy trails just add on,
To the warmth, I feel within,
I felt so safe sipping my coffee,
With you right by my side,
Always smiling, yet so cautious,
Ah! I felt the warmest…
On winter drives with you.
But fate played such a twist,
For on the same roads that we drove,
You were snatched right before my eyes,
Now, the roads are forever red,
Stained in your blood,
And even the summer breeze,
Makes me feel cold,
Ah! I feel the chilliest…
On summers without you.
For NaPoWriMo Day 4
Featured image & inspiration:
I hear his scream,
And I rush to his room,
And I see him,
Trying to move.
I offer him a hand,
He shakes his head,
As he tries to stand,
And get out of the bed.
He winces at every step,
And my heart just breaks,
He lets out a yelp,
And my insides crack.
I wish I could help,
Take away all his pain,
But all I can do is stay,
And watch in vain.
Featured image by: Ivan Samkov from Pexels
Free-spirited soul, happy & glee,
What a beautiful lie she weaves!
Ambitions she has, that she chases,
But that’s just one of her phases.
Every moment, her colour changes,
She pretends to be perfect,
But in reality, she’s deranged,
Her insecurities run deep within,
She trusts no one, not even herself,
Her mind is a pool of negativity,
She’s filled with toxic insecurities,
So, she cuts herself to get rid of it.
And you say you love her,
Like she’s the light of your life,
But how can she light up anything,
When her insides are rotting?
How can she give you anything,
Besides headache and miseries?
Oh, darling, you fell in love,
With a girl not worth loving.
Featured image by: Uus Supendi from Pexels
I saw your eyes, so filled with grief,
I took you in my arms, forgot my pain,
Poured onto you all of my love,
Gave you my heart, body, and soul,
I knew I would never be put first,
But madly in love, I settled being second.
You told me how much she meant to you,
Oh, how she broke you, leaving you all alone,
I let you shed your tears upon my shoulder,
And watched you save her last bus ticket,
You carried it everywhere in your wallet,
As I swallowed my grief, didn’t give you a hint.
Then, somebody else entered your life,
You called her Venus, an embodiment of Aphrodite,
You brought her to the bed we made love in,
You told me how delicately you undressed her,
That’s when my heart could take it no more,
Tears ran down, and you said nothing happened.
Madly in love with you, I believed you,
And some months down the road,
There was yet another woman in your life,
You showed me her nudes, and all your sex talks,
Then, you told me that she meant nothing,
That was lust, and I’m the only one you loved.
In rage and heartbreak, I kissed another guy,
I thought I’d come home and tell you all about it,
But what happened was more than just a kiss,
He touched my soul the way you never did,
We talked in lyrics, and poured out our worries,
Oh, how, I almost fell in love with him.
Fast forwards, five years and multiple affairs later,
I opened my eyes, and then I realized,
My flesh and bones were the only things that mattered,
Yet, my heart craved for you, beaten and battered,
Somewhere deep within, I knew you loved me,
Is it my disillusion? Or do you love me?
But, nothing matters now, does it?
I’ve made up my mind, I’m walking away.
Featured by: Anastasia Shuraeva from Pexels
If my ribcage were a wishbone,
To give a second chance,
To my battle scarred heart,
Or I had some magic potion,
To heal all my bleeding wounds,
I would be tempted to use them all,
To once again, feel new and whole.
But I would fight past my temptations,
And wear my battle scars with pride,
As blood drips down my battered body,
With bullet holes and arrows hanging,
I shall hold my head high,
For all the battles, I valiantly fought,
I survived, and I thrived.
It would be easy to forget it all,
Patch up the scars and wear a mask.
But why would I ever choose to pretend,
When I have a glorious story to tell?
I don’t need magic to heal me,
I’m magical, and so is my journey.
Featured image by: Photo by freestocks.org from Pexels
If I close my eyes tomorrow,
Will you wallow in sorrow?
Or will you just forget me,
My absence unnoticed?
Sometimes I wish you cared,
Sometimes I wish you were near,
But you were never mine,
I have no right to pine.
And as I wonder,
Will you even shed a tear,
If I close my eyes?
I realize…
I’m already deleted,
Your life perfected.
Featured image by: dima_goroziya from Pixabay
That adoring gaze,
Kisses on the forehead,
To be asked if ate,
And cared for when I’m sick,
I wonder…
How does it feel
To be loved?
To be called dad’s princess,
Or mom’s little angel,
To find a soulmate,
To truly belong,
I wonder…
How does it feel
To be loved?
To have parents that care,
About my life too,
Just as much as they care,
About the money I earn,
I wonder…
How does it feel
To be loved?
To have a marriage built on trust,
Not a husband who lusts,
After every single woman,
He lays his eyes on,
I wonder…
How does it feel
To be loved?
To have someone who stays,
Through the good and the bad times,
And stands by my side,
As a strong pillar of hope,
I wonder…
How does it feel
To be loved?
Drained to an extent, I can’t explain;
Amidst poverty and abandonment,
I hang on to a train,
As I hang on to my life,
I wonder…
How does it feel
To be loved?
But no train can take me,
To a place, I’m loved,
‘Cause there’s nobody in the world,
To ever love me,
I wonder…
How does it feel
To be loved?
A Tiny Request:
Bangladeshi Photojournalist, GMB Akash has been taking an initiative to help people around by providing them with education, helping them set up a small business, and more. I’m sure there are more amazing people like him trying to make a difference, promote them, donate if you can.
Most of my poetry this month will revolve around his photostories.
Checkout his blog: https://gmbakash.wordpress.com/
To donate: https://www.patreon.com/gmbakash
For his books, biographies and more: https://www.gmb-akash.com/home
We were young and we were wild,
Didn’t really care for slow or mild,
Dove into love without a second thought,
Fairy tale romance was what we sought,
Our first kiss, pure bliss, like magic;
Slow-deep, then passionate-frantic,
“Better than Romeo and Juliet”, we’d say,
We made promises, didn’t delay,
We were rainbows and springtime roses,
We ran unbound like wild horses.
Until we fell into fall’s hands,
We no longer lived in a fairyland,
Like pretty greens turning orange,
Our chemistry took a drastic change.
You were the one who fell first,
And covered yourself in autumn dust,
Stability, responsibility and what nonsense,
I thought you had gone insane,
But I fell into fall’s hands too,
Once again, we’re the perfect two.
Featured image by: chulmin park from Pixabay
